Premarital Counseling

in Moscow, Idaho

Are you an engaged couple looking for premarital counseling?

Getting married is a life changer! And getting engaged is exciting, joyous, and sometimes just a little scary. That’s normal; it’s a huge decision. Premarital counseling can really help.

You are probably reading this because you are excited to be planning for marriage, but you also want to be wise. You know that you want a marriage that will be healthy and long-lasting, and you can’t help but be aware that not every marriage ends up happily ever after. Maybe you’ve even experienced the devastation of a prior divorce.

You might have a few questions:

  • How can we weather the stress of planning our wedding and working with our families?
  • What if we love each other, but we haven’t worked through all the nitty-gritty things we know we’ll need to collaborate on, like finances, kids, our careers, or concerns about past relationships?
  • We want to be together, but we’re concerned about some patterns in our dating relationship; how do we know what needs to change before we should get married, and how do we improve things?

You want to make sure that you and your future spouse are setting yourselves up for success. That’s just smart thinking, and you’re not alone.

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It’s normal to have butterflies when you get engaged.

Getting engaged to be married is a big deal, and it’s completely normal to have both excitement and worries. With a more than 50% divorce rate—higher for second marriages—it makes sense to take the engagement process seriously.

Taking a deep, honest look into your relationship now can feel a little scary. What if we see things we don’t like, or that we need to change? It’s true that sometimes areas are uncovered that need some attention.

But, doing this work now can lay a foundation for a really healthy, satisfying marriage, and it can help you feel prepared and confident on your wedding day.

Set yourselves up for success in marriage.

 You want to strengthen your bond, deepen your knowledge of each other, and make sure you’ve made the time and space to discuss all the things that will be so important to your future happiness. Premarital counseling is designed to do just that, and there are some terrific tools out there to help.

Get the benefit of one of the top, research-based, premarital assessments out there: Prepare/Enrich.

I’m a certified facilitator of Prepare/Enrich, the leading premarital assessment. Used by thousands of professional counselors, pastors, and organizations worldwide, this assessment will help you uncover both strengths and growth areas to give you confidence that your premarital process is getting to the heart of what’s important.

Work with a counselor trained to help couples.

As a marriage counselor, I have devoted a lot of time and dedication to becoming well trained and experienced working with all kinds of relationship issues. I get a chance to help couples rebuild their marriages when things have gone off track, and I’ve helped a lot of couples do just that. It’s great experience for helping engaged couples get off on the right track!

My work with couples is based on the two top, research-based methods of marriage counseling: The Gottman Method, and Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy. Using these methods, you’ll learn both the art of getting emotionally attuned to your fiancé, and specific conversational and relationship skills for navigating all the decisions, twists, and turns your relationship may take over the years.

It is a true joy to work with a couple before things have gone wrong, when they’re laying the foundation for the marriage they want.

Premarital couple looking happy in the kitchen.

This sounds great, but we have a few questions.

We’re so busy, how are we going to fit this in?

It’s true! Planning a wedding can be really stressful. Great, but tiring! There are lots of ways to create the time for a process that can be foundational to a happy, successful marriage. Some couples choose to come in weekly for a few weeks, carving out just one hour per week. Others choose to structure a more intensive schedule for their premarital counseling by creating time blocks and doing more in less frequent, but longer sessions.

Our wedding is costing a lot, already. Can we afford premarital counseling?

Here’s a taste of what it’s like to work with me. I’m pretty direct! My question back to you is: can you afford to NOT get premarital counseling? When you’re budgeting for your wedding and honeymoon, comparing prices for clothes, flowers, invitations, food, and all the other things that go into planning a wedding, compare the value of investing in your big day with the value of strengthening your relationship to last through a lifetime of days, big and small.

What if we uncover areas where we’re not compatible?

This is a question that sometimes lurks below the surface, unspoken. In the excitement and emotion of falling in love and getting engaged, it can be easy to minimize our concerns or set aside discussions we know we should have. It’s true that sometimes premarital counseling can uncover areas of your relationship that need attention.

But, when you take a deep breath and consider the lifetime commitment you’re making, doesn’t it make sense to look at these areas with courage and to gain tools and insights to address them? When this is done with a the help of a sensitive and knowledgeable counselor, many couples find that working through the difficult places in their relationship creates even greater trust and intimacy moving forward.

Make sure your marriage is as beautiful as your wedding.

Premarital counseling can be one of the best investments you’ll ever make. You can learn and practice approaches to conflict and compromise while you’re also talking deeply about your shared hopes and dreams for the future. You can build the tools you’ll need to lay a healthy foundation and make needed small repairs along the way, like successful couples all do.

It’s my privilege to help premarital couples add confidence to their excitement about getting married.

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